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STRIPPER KNOWS BEST

Jacq

Hi, Jacq 
I have a question that I'm telling myself only a stripper can answer.
About a month ago I stopped into the club on the way home from the airport. It was slow (Tuesday), some of the girls weren't getting tipped at all on the main stage, so eventually I took a couple dancers into the VIP room. The next day I was mentally going through my expenditures from the night before and realized I hadn't tipped the girls for their time in the VIP room. In my mind, I messed up and want to make it right.
I'm not sure how to deal with it if I run into these girls again. Normally, if I feel I under-tipped a "regular" service provider (bartender, waitress, etc.), I acknowledge it the next time I see them and add a little extra to that subsequent tip. I understand everyone's different, but how would a dancer, in general, feel about me simply acknowledging my mistake, buying her a drink, and slipping her $40 - $50 for the previous visit?
Thanks in advance for your advice,
Making it Right 

Dear Making it Right,

Thanks for your email (that you sent me over a month ago). I'm really happy you've found some respite between the tits of some of your hometown's finest rippers. 

Let me begin by saying it it is never too late to tip just like it's never too late to respond to an email. NEVER. Not ever ever ever is it too late to apologize, or to say thank you, (or a unique combination of the two, much like the pickle you're in now). If there is one thing a stripper never forgets it's who failed to palm her a dozen crisp twenties at the end of a fun evening. 

It sounds like you like this place, and that you'd like to continue frequenting it. So, next time you go there, hand each dancer twenty percent of whatever the club charged for the time you spent together. NOT twenty percent of what she earned, but twenty percent of what the house charged. 

Let me explain: When you're going to a restaurant, you tip based on the bill, not how much your server earned per hour while refilling your water glasses and trying to up-sell you on premium Alizé and artisanal condiments. 

I was in a VIP room with a fellow dancer and a guy who got weird (read: whipped out his dick and began reciting poetry with is pants pooling around his ankles), and, after I politely declined to fellate him, kicked me out of the room. The other girl stayed and happily obliged him. It's cool, I get dumped for not putting out at least once a night. But the following week, the same man RAN AFTER ME. Mortified that I'd have to go through that awkwardness again, I hid in the bathroom. I finally resurfaced, and THERE HE WAS, WAGGING HIS TAIL EXPECTANTLY. FUCK. But instead of pleading with me to go back to the VIP again, or telling me that he was disappointed that I didn't want to touch his peen, he taps me on the shoulder, hands me $300, and says, "Sorry you left last time before I could tip you." 

And as freaky as this guy was, and as badly as he wanted that beej that I wasn't going to give him, he still chased me around the club to tip me. A whole week later!  Although I never want to see him again, in my books, this guy is dope. 

So, Make-it-Right, the moment you see your old friends, tip them. With interest ;)

I'm really glad you asked about this. You keep the faith in good customers. I've never danced for you, and I am appreciating the shit out of you all the way from New York!